not so easy anymore =/

For the past 2 semester, before finals, I told God seriously that Him being with me is the most important.

Results don’t really matter when I have Him
I did stuff that caused me to have less time to study
For in Him, I have everything right? =)

Wow… seemed so much faith and trust.

For the past 2 semester, I got 1st class!! =D

When I put Him 1st, He took care of my results
I was in cloud nine and thankfulness.
For in Him, He fulfill my desire =D

Wow… seemed so encouraging and uplifting

After getting 1st class for the past two semesters, it’s really no longer easy to say results don’t really matter when I have Him. I have experienced the happiness to get 1st class & the gaya-ness to be Pemenang Anugerah Akademik Peringkat Kolej & the easily earned 30 merits from kolej for being a 1st class student & the satisfaction to put a smile on my parents’ faces. Oh oh… it’s not so easy to let go my desires and ask Him to take control again.

Wow… seems so susah to say results don’t really matter when I have You

O God, can I have both – You and 1st class?
Can I? Why can’t I?
I know I can’t.
It’s either You or none of You.

O God, I’m so selfish.
I’m very sorry but I can’t help it
I wish I am not so greedy
I wish I trust you more

Oh, I can wish as much as I want
But I still have to make a stand, a decision
Thank you for you unfailing love and grace
Loving the selfish, greedy me

Once again, I lay down my desires and have You to take control
I know You will take care of me when I have You
Once again I want to tell you that results don’t really matter when I have You
I want to choose you over stuff of the world

Ouch! It’s not easy, God.
But I know, one day, when I read back I will remember this day
The day that I struggle and argued with my flesh and You
The day that I made a wise decision and will not regret it

Thank You for letting go and risking Your crown for me
Thank You for doing the will of the Father for me
Thank You for loving me the doubter, me the no body :)
Thank You

HUGS!